Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
ANNOUNCMENT
I scored my FIRST sit down interview with none other than sweetsexyts of Youtube. I will be meeting with sweetsexyts later on this week .. I'm so excited so stay tuned. \As soon as the interview is ready for viewing I will post it here FIRST! hugsss
ErikaX
ErikaX
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Thursday, March 5, 2009
DEAR DIARY" my first kiss"
Dear diary,
wheew where do I start, Well today im feeling much better than I did yesterday. Yesterday was a challenge for me.. I took big steps towards making me a better me spirtualy. I know that I didint say much in my last diary entry so i figure I make some what of a continuation of lastnites blog. I'll start back at my appointment with my phychologist. One of the other main topics we talked about again a subject on my chilhood.. It's the biggest part of my past that I am working on understanding and getting help with. When I Ran away from home after that situation where I was beaten . I went to stay at a friends house about 30 miles away from where my home was located.. at her place" she was also the same age as myself at the time" and a ts in transition" we bonded so quick and immediately became best of friends.. I rememeber I actually had my first kiss in her brothers bedroom..haha im totally grining rite now.. because it wa so awkward .And like many of you I'm sure you never forget ur first kiss..I am now a year older and it has been about 2 months since arriving at her front door. And her brother was totaly trying to get me to talk to his friend.. I, being so young and clueless was like " ok sure" haha so random I know.. anyway this was when pagers was the new tech toy and so I told my new best friends brother to give his friend my pager number.. I was quite the Exhibitionest "wink".. so he did and later that nite he paged me and OMG I was in total aww for him from tht very first page ..lol.. I was already telling other friends tht he was my BF then I would get a page and be like " see thts him hes saying hi" omg he loves me..lol I was so off and green back then. Ok, so after a few days of exchaging pages we discussed meeting up and when he said " hey lets meet up " it hit me...I ran to my bestfriend and woke her up and whisperd.." gurl does he know my T" and as I should have guessed she replies" mary he dosent know" . why"? If I didint want to poke her eyes out rite there and then .. but I knew she had to mk breakfast for us so I let her keep her vision.. I was soo nervous..I didint want to tell him no because well he loved me..lol.. from what my raging hormones seem to hv made me think..= ) so I jus said u know what im gonna just do it and when he comes here and he realizes that I am TS and leaves then ill jus let it be wht it is.. know what i mean.. so this is the funny part. I have such a big grin on my face rite now in anticipation of typing wht happend next..Ok so my dizzy bestfriend deciddes to give me a make over.. now at this young age you can probly guess how it's gonna turn out.So this crazy tranny grabs her mothers makeup which is at least 2 shades lighter than my complextion at the time and spackles it unto my face..then she grabes this black thick old school black eyelineer and decides to color in my eyebrows.. now keep in mind i hvnt yet been introduced to a tweezer so I was full rockin butch eyebrows on top of having eyebrows like Elmo she decides to darken them with black eyeliner.. so now i look like if elmo and uncle fester had a baby i was tht baby..lol..then this beauty expert decides to convince me to wear these ziplock bags filled with smucks peanut butter and jelly as breast..lol..wait it gets worse.. after walking around me a few times and carefully making sure the exact amount of P&J are in each home made breast..this gooney has another bright idea...so picture me there in the room full white grayesh make up with the thickest and darkest eyebrows known to exhist with P&j filled bra..she comes running to me and says put this on.. so im like ohh whats this.. she handed me a small case. I open one part of this little case and it was a blue contact lense.. so now im thinking this is gonna get better.. I open the other side and lol.. theres nothing..and shes says.. ohh yea theres only one, put it on. So now diary ..I have a gray corpse colored face peanutbuter and jelly titts .. thick ass dark black eyebrows and 1 blue eye..hahahaha..sad to admit I kept tht look and got ready for his arrival.. few hours later he comes to the house, im so nervous.. im acting as if I dont hear him come into the house.. he was the same age as me at the time.. so im in the kitchen with my back faced towards him acting like im washing dishes .. I hear him whisper to my friends brother.. wow she looks good..so he takes this guy into his room and comes back to me and says.. hes in the room he wants to meet u..ohh lord..ok so I take a deep breathe.. give my best friend the finger and walk into the room... now I dont know if it was his hormones running like crazy or if he was partial blind.. but he tells me as soon as I walk in..Wow ur so pretty..I sit next to him .. we get to talking and then wheew I know its coming.. im shaking and am staring at him directly into his eyes and then jus like a hollywood movie.. he grabs my bottom jaw leans in and gives me a kiss.. a soft gentle kiss on the lips.ahhhhh it was like magic..i rememeber having my eyes closed and this sensation simliar to when u get goose bumps totally took over my body..i was floating almost in a sense and it was purely amazing. after my memorable first amazing kiss we just sat there and talked and talked.. moving in to join lips every so often then back to talking..we later said our good byes and promised to keep paging each other as we of course continued to do.. and after a few weeks he moved away and till today I have yet to see him...aww I will never forget that nite.. = ) and that Diary was my very first kisss....
xoxo ErikaX
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Dear Diary
Dear diary ,
Sot today I went in to see and discuss a few things over with my Phychologist. It started out normal..we greeted each other and then i was sent into the waiting room until my name was called. While in the waiting room there was this guy..i guessed his age to be probably around 30-35 and this guy just could not stop staring . I mean full on gawking at me, Now I'm not sure if he knew that I was looking directly into his eye due to the fact that i had my dark sunglasses on but geez, c'mon . I felt so uncomfortable in that waiting room and what made things worst is the nurse comes out of the office and calls my Boy name.. i was so pissed I was like umm hello My name isn't that anymore could you be more sensitive.. I know shes just doing her job but were in a shrinks office anything can set a person off.. know what I mean .. Well any ways.. I went into the office had a sat on the chair..with what seems to be the most horrible lighting.. it was that fluorescent light bulb lighting.. very hospital.. anyways it was a little hard to relax being that i was a little nervous and kind of worked up a little panic mood b4 i left but o well . Main this is that I am here. So my phychologist comes in and i swear she is the most kind women I know thus far.. shes the type of person where you just feel so comfortable know. so we start talking about how may week went prior to this appointment.. you see i seen her a week b4 this so she was basically checking up to see how i was progressing.. but anyway.. back to the story.. we started talking about how i feel i progressed from last week and to be honest i told her.. i really feel the same.. well i take that back i do feel a little different because of our last visit i almost felt as if i can breathe a little easier now.. then we started talking about my child hood again.. This! you see is such a huge thing for me because i have never discussed anything about my childhood to anyone..So I relaxed and started to talk.. I talked about being physically abused as a child..and more kinds of abuse tht i dont want to talk about rite now but even typing this now I almost feel in a sense that I'm releasing alot of the burden that i have carried for the past 17 years.. you see when I was 12 years old I was kicked out of my home..well i was more so pushed out.. why.. well i was really beaten pretty badly by my father that day and i can almost remember step by step like as if it happened just a few minutes ago.. I ran up stairs and hid in the closet unto i could hear him going back down the stairs.. then i knew at that moment that i had to get away .. so I did .. I packed what I could into a little bag and i opened my bedroom window and jumped 2 stories and landed unto my back yard.. then i made a run for it..I ran so fast i never knew my legs ha so much power in them... I ran all the way to the nearest bus stop and just sat there crying with a fat lip and just looking terrible.. I got unto the bus and the bus driver at first did int let me sit down he was kind of takin back to see me like that.. but i just shrugged him off and sat down far back into the bus hide my face into my bag and just cried..I ended up going to a friends house a few miles from where i lived.. some place that i knew my dad could never find me.. and that was the beginning of it all.. you see Diary i never in a million life times would have ever guessed that this is how my life would turn out..all through school i was a straight A student i won all the academic awards .. first place in science fairs and I was always the one that my parents would constantly tell others that I was gonna be somebody special.. so from going from that to being hit in the face simply for being me was a total shock... and at that young age i didn't know how to accept it and instead retaliated against everyone including my self.. Diary I became such a bad person ..and it is nothing I am proud of..But as I have mentioned ear;lier.. this is where my life took a turn for the worse..I want tobe able to type out word for word what happened but I am still coping with myself in who I can trust with this and its a really big step for me.. simply writing this rite now opening up jus a little peek into what i have been holding inside for all these years is such a huge accomplishment and i am proud of myself for even doing that.. I do plan on writing here everything and taking everything.. and leaving it here to stay soon..Ill talk to you soon diary..say a prayer for me..
xoxoErikaX
Meet My Crazy Long Lost Brother!
My Homegurl acting all crazy..lol..This video is a Must Watch Enjoy!
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
HOT SEXY THOUGHTSIN MY NYLON FITTED LINGEIRE
As I sit here in my nylon fitted lingerie these sudden thoughts and weird emotions come over me in such a way
I slowly rub my hands across my nylon feet feeling the silkiness glides through my fingers that feeling I'm so in deep
Up my leg and across my Nylon crotch the tingling sensation in my panties..erected I become slowly peeking through.. the nylon fitted panties I wear In blue
I start to take notice my Big supple breast, 36DDD moving in slow motion back and forth.
I rub my french tip manicured nails down and up my inner thigh, the pressure I feel building up inside.
I start to lick my lipgloss off my lips , my eyes start to slowly close, I lay back and slowing open my legs
my eyes close shut, my lips so wet, I reach for my Nylon legs, lifting one gently in the air, the feeling of pure lust, the scent of my hair
I reach under my blue nylon panties gently petting my Clit, I moan in pleasure I whisper you name, inside it starts to get wet
Warm and soft the feeling like cotton , my fingers slide gently inside my love canal I feel you kiss me,
I glide my lips across your tongue, crushing your mouth against my soft skin , pulling in , I start to shake
You come up to my mouth and start to kiss me deep, your fingers I feel inside of me you push, ahhh your in so deep
I suck on your tongue and taste my juices they flow, inside my mouth your fingers meets my tongue
I lick off the passion the taste of desire, I Beg for you to enter me I'm hot so hot like fire
inside you thrust, your manhood so stiff we moan and yurn you kiss me so deep
I'm so wet, i feel you throb , your breathe so warm, against my neck you cant take it anymore I say I'm close
Again you thrust inside i tremble, my lust for you overflows onto you
The flow of juices i cannot stop you blow inside me ,
you lean into me and kiss me deeply, I whisper into your ear sounds of pleasure
you lean into me and kiss me deeply the feeling of relief comes over of us both, the bed so wet
hot sexy thoughts I feel, in my nylon lingerie
ErikaX
I slowly rub my hands across my nylon feet feeling the silkiness glides through my fingers that feeling I'm so in deep
Up my leg and across my Nylon crotch the tingling sensation in my panties..erected I become slowly peeking through.. the nylon fitted panties I wear In blue
I start to take notice my Big supple breast, 36DDD moving in slow motion back and forth.
I rub my french tip manicured nails down and up my inner thigh, the pressure I feel building up inside.
I start to lick my lipgloss off my lips , my eyes start to slowly close, I lay back and slowing open my legs
my eyes close shut, my lips so wet, I reach for my Nylon legs, lifting one gently in the air, the feeling of pure lust, the scent of my hair
I reach under my blue nylon panties gently petting my Clit, I moan in pleasure I whisper you name, inside it starts to get wet
Warm and soft the feeling like cotton , my fingers slide gently inside my love canal I feel you kiss me,
I glide my lips across your tongue, crushing your mouth against my soft skin , pulling in , I start to shake
You come up to my mouth and start to kiss me deep, your fingers I feel inside of me you push, ahhh your in so deep
I suck on your tongue and taste my juices they flow, inside my mouth your fingers meets my tongue
I lick off the passion the taste of desire, I Beg for you to enter me I'm hot so hot like fire
inside you thrust, your manhood so stiff we moan and yurn you kiss me so deep
I'm so wet, i feel you throb , your breathe so warm, against my neck you cant take it anymore I say I'm close
Again you thrust inside i tremble, my lust for you overflows onto you
The flow of juices i cannot stop you blow inside me ,
you lean into me and kiss me deeply, I whisper into your ear sounds of pleasure
you lean into me and kiss me deeply the feeling of relief comes over of us both, the bed so wet
hot sexy thoughts I feel, in my nylon lingerie
ErikaX
Sunday, March 1, 2009
LIPGLOSS FETISH
On my way to go out tonite with my best friends but am undecided what to wear..or how I should sexy up my makeup. I hesitate for a few minutes thinking of that very kiss that I shared with that special guy that I met the last time I went out with these girls.. gosh I know that he is gonna be there tonite. should I dress up to CACTH his attention immediately, or simply dress down to have him find me in a crowd. Ohhh the horror one girl must endure when trying to figure out what goes best with what and the kind of impression I wanna leave when he thinks about me tomorrow..wait, does he think about me? does he remember my name? ughh I guess Ill find out tonite wont I. O well what ever. I think I'll choose this.. yes my lucky lace lingerie bra with pink satin lining .. I always feel sexy in this..and I think it will be a confidence booster if I choose to become a looser at the very last second before walking into the party..now for the hair.. up or down? up would seem as if I'm to ughh idk stuck up and with my guard up.. I definitely dont want to seem cold.. ok. down it is.. ohh hunny I am looking fierce if I may so so my self.. now for the lip gloss.. what colorrrrrrr.. ohh yea.. ohh yess..HOT PINK.. hes gonna love that..I mean what guy wouldn't be turned on by HOT PINK LIPS huh.. especially on me..lol.. ok.. now if I can only get in the mood... let me record a video ..that's it .. ill record a video that way I can see exactly how he is gonna see me..gosh i sound so conceited.. ok here goesssssssssssss
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